Eats anything, loves children. A.k.a. Fazil (don't ask), this tapir (Tapirus terrestris, an endangered species) was rescued when his mother had the misfortune to encounter some hunters. The orphan started the urban phase of his fascinating life in the back garden on Neal St Aubyn's parents house in Campbellville, Georgetown. However, Neal's brothers didn't feed the blighter frequently enough so it took to rampaging through the fences into neighbours gardens. Paul loves to eat flowers and Nadia Jabour's house next door presented the ideal opportunity. She' s a florist you see and, well, you can guess the rest. Enter Mr Jabour with a large gun, muttering threats about calling the police and enquiring about recipes for barbeque sauce. Common sense prevailed and Paul moved into Neal's own back garden.

Neal feeds him regularly and tickles him behind the ear. He enjoys this although it's a little hard to tell. Tapir's don't exactly frolic like lambs. Paul eats a 100lb bag of wheat bran every ten days. The mathematically gifted among you will have calculated that this is ten pounds of bran a day. Lets just say that you can set your watch by Paul... He gets through a large sack of fruit and vegetables weekly too. He likes to drink beer (suggesting Tapir as The Origin of the Species?). This is why he's called Paul. Any reference to Irish Hoteliers Living And Working In Guyana is entirely co-incidental.

The good news is that Paul (the tapir, not the hotelier) is to embark on a wonderful journey in the very near future. A new home has been found for him at Rock View Eco-Tourism Resort in the stunningly beautiful North Rupununi in Guyana's interior. He'll have his own pool and will no doubt find it more stimulating than Republic Park (the site of the photo above). you can learn more than you probably need about Tapirs at this great site: The Tapir Gallery